Nearly everyone recognizes that judgmental voice inside us that heckles and cuts us down. A voice that almost always finds a reason for us to be “not enough”.
Grappling with the inner-critic voice (called sometimes imposter syndrome) is a lifetime journey because it’s part of us, humans. Even the most successful people suffer from it. So, don’t beat yourself up, Mama, it’s natural to have it :). Especially, us, moms, society has set very high standards for us: juggling it all.
Michelle Obama says that imposter syndrome has never goes away.
“What’s helped me most is remembering that our worst critics are almost always ourselves.”
-Michelle Obama
And if we cannot eradicate it, what can we do about it?
In today’s episode, you will learn how to tame your inner critic and stop it from holding you back from achieving your career goals and reaching more of your potential.
Step 1: Identify your inner critic
Taming your inner critic of course always begins with awareness. Question it and separate those words from you.
Because most of the time, we hear that voice and we believe it or let it affect us immediately. It’s like those thoughts became us.
So how to separate yourself from your inner critic? Create a character for it, give it a name.
Close your eyes, and then try to visualize that voice. From whom is it coming from and imagine a character for it. It can be an imaginary character or it can be someone you know, someone who criticizes you. For me, I have a funny imaginary name for my inner critic that comes from my childhood.
By giving it a character, it will help you to deal with the inner critic. So the next time you hear something from your inner critic you can say that it is not you.
Step 2: what is the inner critic telling you
Pay attention to what your inner critic is telling you and recognize that just because you think something, doesn’t mean it’s true.
Writing down your thoughts allows you to become more aware of your habitual tendencies. So write down repetitive inner critic thoughts and think of alternative statement you want to tell yourself.
Convert a negative thought to a more rational and realistic statement. When you find yourself thinking, “I never do anything right,” replace it with a balanced statement like, “Sometimes I do things really well and sometimes I don’t.” Each time you find yourself thinking an exaggeratedly negative thought, respond with the more accurate statement.
Step 3: Turn your inner critic into your inner coach
It is from “The Success Principles” book by Jack Canfield, it says imagine having a conversation with your inner critic. Use it as a challenge to help you move forward in a better way.
Think of your inner critic as a guardian that stands over you protecting you from pain. So rather than resisting our inner critic, thank and be compassionate with it.
Instead of always telling yourself that you’re not good enough and reminding yourself that you can work to become better. Acknowledge that you have flaws but determine to remain a work in progress as you strive to become better.
BONUS TIP
Have an accountable person
This person will remind you that you can do it and encourage you. He/she can help strengthen your confidence when your inner critic becomes too overbearing. And help ease that voice and make it a little bit less noisy.
Oftentimes, the inner-critic voice is louder when it’s about our deepest dreams! Making them feel impossible and preventing us from giving freedom to our true selves.
Take the step now and download the workbook I created for you to help you become stronger in the face of self-doubt. You can do it, Mama!